Improving your child’s emotional quotient | Emotional intelligence | Emotional intelligence quotient
A window into the world of emotions— With tight fists and a clenched mouth, little Raju stamped out of the door in a rage. His mother was fuming too and shouted out “You are grounded, no television and no Xbox for a week, now that’s your punishment for scoring badly in Maths”.
I am sure we can all related to this, a common picture in every household, isn’t it? Anger is inevitable but the impact that it has is definitely worrisome. ‘to err is human, to forgive divine’, so emotions are a part and parcel of us Homo sapiens.
But can we call ourselves emotionally intelligent? Well, we are all aware of IQ, right! But what is EQ?
Emotional intelligence definition by Daniel Goleman
According to studies," IQ contributes to about 20% of the factors that determine success, which leaves 80% to other forces"; forces grouped as emotional intelligence (Daniel Goleman)."
So, we can brand ourselves as high EQ people only if we can understand, perceive, analyse others emotions and react accordingly.
Making a decision to become a parent is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. Children believe what they see, not what they are told. Hence, being a guardian with high EQ matters!
There is no such thing as a perfect parent, so just be a real one. When you are raising a kid with high EQ ok, you are gifting the world a balanced human who shall make the earth a beautiful abode!!
Improving your child’s Emotional Quotient- A few tips and tricks
1. Never punish a child for being honest.
The moment you do it, you teach the child to lie and cheat.
Inculcate courage, the world needs it! Courage and the power to speak your mind is lacking in the world today.
We all are trying to raise politically correct children and not happy and free thinking individuals.
2. Treat your kids as humans, not pressure cookers!
Expectations overload will only blow the whistle. So as parents, take it easy on the kid.
Never make an effort to etch the destiny of your ward because our role as parents is not to decide the child’s ambition and dreams, but to just facilitate them and help children achieve their dreams.
3. Raise a human, not a robot!
Sit down! Stand up! Eat, sleep, study and talk! C’mon the child has a mind of his or her own.
Too many instructions will only ruin it.
Our children are not programmed robots.
Nature has been ever kind to bless them with the power to reason and take decisions.
Decision making is a trait that should be ingrained in every child.
4. ‘C’ for compassion.
Being humane is more herculean than just being successful.
Personality building is key and that comes by installing human values such as care, trust, respect and compassion.
At all times dare to be an individual who is fearless, ethical and genuine.
5. Being ‘cool’.
Posh clothes, flawless English, trendy gadgets and a fantastic report card do not make a child ‘cool’.
Being cool is definitely not about what you have or where you hail from. Instead it is about self- concept, self- awareness and the art of being at peace with one self. Today’s world makes insecurity crop up in the minds of people and children thereby turning them malicious and narcissistic. Smartness is not just about superficial factors but instead it evaluates the child’s core traits such as mindfulness, obedience, calm disposition, honesty and ethics.
so let’s join hands for a better tomorrow by raising children with higher emotional quotient. Children who are ebullient, courageous and kind!!
High EQ –> charming wards –> magnificent adults –> Heavenly world!!
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Emotional Intelligence FAQ
1. How can I improve my child's Emotional Intelligence?
The first step is to be patient towards your child.
Secondly, allow your child to make mistakes and learn from them.
Finally, exhibit learning skill whenever the child wants to communicate.
2. Why is it important for a parent to make concerted efforts towards improving a child's emotional health?
Children are responsive to sensitive care. When parents make an effort towards improving a child emotional health, they learn critical skills such as the ability to connect and communicate with others.
3. Is Emotional Intelligence different from Emotional Quotient?
Scientist say these abilities are different. While some measure to assess them overlap, most researchers agree that they tap different constructs.
4. Is an emotionally intelligent kid more respectful in his dealings with parents and elders?
Experts say, when parent do their bit to enhance EQ, they raise kids who have the ability to empathise and be respectful in their dealings.
5. Will my child be on top of his class if he is emotionally intelligent?
It is definitely a gateway to better learning, friendships and academic success when these skills are developed in the formative years.
6. What is the one thing you would want to improve in a child who lags behind in lessons?
Let the child sleep well. ADD, ADHD all stem from lack of quality sleep.
Guest post by Sadhna Sudershana ,
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30 comments
Very interesting, thank you for sharing.
Thanks a ton!!!!keep the discussion on! The more we interact with each , the healthier kids we raise!
These are great tips for parenting. I find number 1 so true, as well as number 2. The latter pushes children to be pressured or be depressed because of wanting to follow parents whims.
True!depression maybe deep seated in kids! And we as parents need to be very careful!
I really loved your post. I think every parent should read this. Especially the part raise a human, not a robot.
Parents assume that pressure is the mantra to drive kids to success! But this notion needs to change as pressure creates negativity!
Being human is more important than just success!
Such great advice! I think sometimes we tend to put so much pressure on our kids and forget that at the end of the day they are still kids.
Parents assume that pressure is the mantra to drive kids to success! But this notion needs to change as pressure breeds negativity! And is a major resin for depression!
Emotional intelligence is very important! And very helpful in the growing up years.
This is such a good post for a parent!!! Get this to go viral!!
The school system is so wrong, by putting all children on the same level, even if they are good at different things. it is wrong to expect all children to be good at math for example, and punish the ones who are not.
All five fingers are not the same!we should not expect fishes to climb a tree!
What a great list of tips! I also like that there are more books now on different emotions and how it is okay to have them. The Worry Woo series is a fantastic one that helps kids learn about emotions.
Thanks a ton!!!will pen down many more!
This is so true, every child is difficult and should be treated such
All of us were also babies once…. they only seek for patience!
This is something I struggle with as a parent. I think a lot of parents do as well. Thank you for your advice.
Don’t have kids yet but good to know for the future 🙂
Firstly, I love the doodles on your website. Kudos on that. And yes, I too am very interested in child psychology therefore this was really a good read.
Very helpful and informative, thank you for sharing this intelligence
I will be sharing this. It makes so much sense and so very helpful
Very good article. Kind and confident is what I tell my children to be.
It’s very easy for us parents to be tempted to control our children in every way we can. But as what I have experienced in raising my kids, it’s very important to teach them to be independent even at a young age.
Pretty good advice. I’ll try to keep this in mind for when we have kids 🙂
I agree with all of these. Parents should be careful when raising their kids. I know it’s easy said than done – I’m not a parent yet btw. Thank you for sharing this with us!
I believe that is a mistake most parents make; punishing a child for being honest. I’d rather have my son tell the truth and come to terms that although he was honest that it was wrong. But at the same time embrace the fact that they are honest to them.
This is some very helpful advice. I have two young children and am trying to raise them to be well-rounded individuals!
I think compassion is so important! Good article
Pretty useful actually. Like Evan said parents don’t invest enough time to understanding a child’s emotional needs. Good post